“Write hard and clear about what hurts.” -Ernest Hemingway
Sometimes the hardest things to read, are the best words you hear. Countless things I remember in my undergrad major (Women and Gender Studies) were disturbing, infuriating, and sad. To me, if I left class still thinking about a topic we discussed in class, no matter how “dark” it was, it was a good class. I much rather learn about something negative if it is real. Enough of the god damn fluff. The world has plenty to be happy about, but why force it? Everything is not sweet and dandy; and that’s ok.
Like Hemingway’s quote states, things that hurt are relatable. Take my blog for instance. A lot of what goes on here makes people close to me very uncomfortable. But I know that somewhere out there, someone is reading it and feeling a sense of familiarity. So what might be uncomfortable to you, could be a sense of comfort for another person fighting this battle. I want to provide a connection to someone who fights a disease that tricks your mind into thinking you are alone when there are millions out there feeling the same thing. A connection to someone uses isolation even though they feel utterly alone. A connection to someone who has been told “It’s all in your head.” or ” it’s just another diagnosis society gives, not something real.”
I write here to clear my own head, as well to reach out to others.
ON ANOTHER NOTE:
Recently a friend posted a similar photo on fb of a brain scan of “normal” vs depressed. I have to saw I was shocked and a sense of I TOLD YOU SO came over me like a child.
PET scan shows neurological activity levels between two different brains; one with depression. Looks pretty blue to the right……
anxiety attack anyone?
flashbacks don’t exist huh?
So please tell me again to get over it, it’s all in my head (figuratively; literally is my brain.) , or that I’m crazy for believing in light therapy results, or that I don’t need medicine, or that I don’t have flashbacks, or that I need to calm down when I’m in the middle of a panic attack. Please. Make my day.